Stand Back! Ambulance Service

I have just finished a run of two night shifts at the coast, what a hectic place in the winter. I always imagined these places to be busy during the summer with the tourists etc but this time of year?

So much happened over the two nights I will break it down into a few postings, apologies that they may not be in chronological order.

This particular evening, I was working with an experienced Paramedic, we had already had a hectic night and it was around 00:30, just got back to base and half way through my cup of tea when the radio starts bleeping, Emergency appears on the tiny screen. Just as we are about to leave, the phone rings, it's control, 'Don't go to the job till the Police arrive.'

We jump in the truck and it is my turn to attend. I look at the screen and hit the send button to accept the job, without really reading the description properly.

I then re-read the description: 'Caller is mad, threatening suicide' - hum, this one is going to be fun. For those of you who are into your political correctness, mad may seem a less than acceptable term to use but it actually used to mean Mental Affected Disorder, which was used to describe all manner of mental illness. I will let you be the judge of whether you thought control were using it in this context.

We run to the job and as we turn into the road, we see a Police BMW area car parked on the left, curious as the address given is not at this end of the street, maybe he is attending another call?

Dick turns all the lights off, including the headlights and we cruise upto the block of flats in darkness, no sign of the Police here. We call up control to check if the Police are on scene and wait. As they come back to us to confirm, a rather large 'doorman' looking copper comes around the corner.

"Your guy is fine, just seen him come out of his flat, he is on the first floor but cannot get in as there is an electronic lobby door to the flats, which he refuses to open. Going to get my crowbar, back in a sec, parked at the wrong end of the bloody street"

Feeling slightly more safe, I let go of the central locking button and climb out of the cab and go around to the block entrance.

Dick tries to jimmy the lock with his Gerber tool, yet another skill training school seemed to have missed off the syllabus! no joy, until Mr Policeman turns up and gets us in, in under 3 secs with very large crowbar.

We head upto the flat and find the patient ranting and raving, hitting himself on the head and generally looking like someone not in control of all his emotions. He does however, look surprisingly heathly, again a 'why are we here?' moment for me.

We go into the flat with the Police and try and find out what is going on. Apparently, everyone is out to get him and we are all f*****g bastards involved in the consipracy, never actually been involved in a conspiracy before, so feel quite proud at this point.

I gather up his medications, while Dick talks to the patient. He is very aggressive, particularly to the copper. "I will only talk to the Ambulance, not the f*****g Police, he justs wants to section me." I couldn't really disagree with his logic, he had a point and it was highly probable he was about to be proved right. The copper says he will stand outside to make things easier, not sure I wanted to be left alone with this guy and the range of kitchen utentials he had out on the side, being assulted with an egg whisk on my first week would not do much for street cred, was trying not think about the large bread knife I could see in arms reach.

After a rather heated 10min debate, we finally establish that he wants to go to hospital before he kills himself, I have to agree, from a medical point, this would be the best way around too.

Finally get the patient outside the flat, after a long debate as to why he can't make himself a sandwich before we go to hospital, when he kicks off again about leaving his key behind. The copper, generous to a fault, says he will go and get the keys and heads into the flat.........

At this point the patient, slams the door, produces the so called keys and deadlocks the door, before running off shouting something about, I sectioned him before he could section me!.

This called for a brief explaination through the letterbox about what had happened and some additional skills that training school kindly deem inapproriate to teach us.

'Stand Back' as Dick gives the door several kicks, unfortunately it's not moving. Another chat through the letterbox and out comes the crowbar, through the slot. Dick levers the door, while I give it several good kicks, no joy again but at least it has moved slightly.

A short note to the people who make council fire doors, well done lads!

We change over and I jimmy the door and with a final kick from Dick, it gives way and we release one very pissed off and ever so slightly embarrassed Police Officer. "Where the f**k is he?"

My guess, as we did not lock the truck, is he will be in the back. sure enough, we get downstairs, open the side door and there he is sitting in the dark!

After a brief chat about the facts of life from the police we sit him down at the back of the truck for the run into hospital. Dick asks if I am OK in the back with him and some reflex goes off in my head and I say yes, without really thinking. I now develop a pathological obsession with passenger safety and insist the patient wears his seat belt, thinking it would give me a few secs if he kicked off before he could get it undone, Dick is one step ahead and straps him to the chair with the longboard straps, with the buckle behind the seat! Now feel safe to move.

The run into hospital consisted of me trying to question the patient for details about the patient report form, while he ranted about his front door being off it's hinges. "Bloody coppers, kicked my door in, they can't do that!"

Well actually, that was us.

On arrival at hospital, Dick had phoned for security and when we opened the back doors, we were surrounded by three rather large blokes, who were surprisingly polite.

As we ran into hospital throughout the night with various other patients, I could hear this guy still ranting from the examination room and occassionally see a security guy in the corridor rolling his eyes and sighing.

Funny thing is that throughout the whole episode, I never did see a mental health professional attend the patient, it was all left to the A&E team and the emergency services to deal with. I guess care in the community has more emphasis on the community bit than the care bit.